I thought I left you for good
by Leeyna
Summary: Sequel to 'Leaving for good'. Three years later Julian is getting ready for an event when memories come rushing back. But memories aren't the only things that come rushing back into his life. CP Coulter's Daltonverse Julian/Logan
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is a sequel to my other story 'Leaving for good'. Again it is based in CP Coulter's Daltonverse and I am using her lovely characters Logan and Julian. **

**

* * *

**

Julian stood in front of the large mirror in his bedroom putting the finishing touches on his outfit. He hated those formal charity events. They always reminded him too much of the times when he was younger and his parents dragged him with them. But even worse were the memories of his school and his friends, especially…. No! He wasn't going to go there tonight. He would have to be happy, carefree and presentable in less than an hour. There was no time to dwell in painful memories now.

He stared at his reflection in the mirror. The impeccably pressed dark suit fit him perfectly, clinging tightly in all the right places. The light blue dress shirt underneath showed off his toned chest nicely. The only thing he dreaded was the tie. Whenever an event allowed it he would not bother with a tie but this was one of those events where he had to wear one. It just reminded him too much of his everyday routine at Dalton. There, he had thought the dreaded name. He avoided to even think about it, it just brought back all the memories.

Julian sighed deeply, threw the tie in his hand back onto his bed and walked into his kitchen. Opening one of the cabinets he pulled out a glass and set it onto the counter. Normally he didn't drink before the charity events because there were enough people giving him drinks as an excuse to start a conversation. But at this moment he needed the dark liquor he pulled out of his fridge and poured himself half a glass. Swirling it around before taking the first sip he wondered why all those memories came rushing back tonight.

There were enough other occasions where he was wearing a suit or getting ready for a charity event but normally he shielded himself well enough to not succumb to losing himself in the past. Why was tonight different? He couldn't put his finger on the feelings and thoughts running through his mind.

So much had changed since he had left that night. He moved into this fancy apartment when he turned 20 last month. He had taken on more complex and difficult roles to distract himself from everything else. And the biggest change had happened the week after he had left school.

_**Julian stared at the phone in his hand. 76 unread messages and 132 unanswered calls from Logan. **_

_**He was so tempted to read the messages and possibly even answer a call but he couldn't. Julian knew that once he read whatever Logan was sending him, he would cave and probably end up back at Dalton while Logan was just playing one of his games to prove his power over him. He couldn't do that. He needed to leave all of this behind in order to have a chance of moving on. **_

_**Julian knew that this was a shitty plan and would hurt his friends but for once in his life he needed to put himself before caring about Logan and his feelings. **_

_**An hour later he was back from his little shopping trip with a new phone and a new number. Once again he pulled the old one out of his pocket and sent a message to Derek explaining that he would change numbers but would call him soon. Then he paused for a moment trying to figure out what he could possibly tell Logan. Maybe reading one of his texts would be good to at least see what the blonde boy wants.**_

_**Hesitantly Julian scrolled through the texts and decided to just randomly open one. **_

"_**What the fuck is wrong with you, Julian? Answer your fucking phone. You can't just leave. We need to talk! Please…" **_

_**That was almost exactly what Julian had expected. Except for the last pleading word. Logan had never been the pleading type of guy. Julian could feel his inside turning and his decision to leave it all behind wavering. No! He needed this. **_

_**So he opened a new text and typed. "Logan, I just need space right now. I'm sorry for what happened, I lost control. I'll talk to you soon!"**_

Those were the last words he had exchanged with Logan. After sending the message he turned off his old phone and put it into his nightstand.

That was three years ago. He had talked to Derek at least once a month on the phone but had asked him not to tell Logan. Only twice did Derek bring the topic of Logan up. It seemed like Logan had been even more confused after Julian had left and the doctors had upped his medication.

Of course he felt guilty about leaving Logan behind after their kiss but it was the right decision.

So much had changed but more importantly, so much had stayed the same. No matter how hard Julian tried not to think about the blonde boy or wonder how he'd look now, at one point he'd always end up comparing people on the streets to Logan.

Julian dated around quite a lot. Well, not so much that it would be bad for his reputation but he was young and had desires. The problem was, he could sleep with a girl (and there were many to choose from) but he'd never be able to completely let go with her. Somehow during the act the picture of Logan would pop into his mind and he'd be distracted and depressed. The girls never noticed anything but as soon as Logan popped into his head, Julian only wanted to get it over with and get rid of the girl.

He was very careful about showing himself in the public with girls and only ever brought the ones he knew better or was friends with to premieres or charity events. At least he wouldn't have to deal with them being clingy, that was a plus to female friends.

From time to time tall, toned, blonde guys would find their way into Julian's bed. At first he hadn't noticed that he always picked up guys who resembled Logan so much. His subconscious seemed to do that automatically. The problem was that none of them could give Julian what he wanted, what he needed.

Most guys were gentle with him where he needed them to be rough. No one ever talked back. They worshipped him, glad to get into bed with a celebrity. That was one of the problems of picking up fans. A second one was the obvious problem with them not talking about this because the public image of Julian was still straight. But even the other actors he hooked up with could never really give him what he needed. So after some time he gave up on picking guys up it just wasn't worth it when he knew exactly what he wanted or to be more precise who he wanted.

Logan

Julian brought the glass back up to his lips and drank the rest in one big gulp. The liquor burned in his throat but he didn't care he needed the memories and thoughts to stop. Without thinking he poured himself a second glass that he downed completely in one swig.

Ever so slowly the muscles that had tensed up with the onslaught of memories started to relax. Julian knew that he hadn't had so much that he'd be tipsy after a couple of more drinks at the event but he felt like he could breathe again.

Whenever his mind wandered back to the beautiful blonde Julian felt like he was drowning. Like he couldn't breathe. He hated feeling this helpless but he had learned to live with it and had found a way to make himself breathe again. The thing he hated most was the power those memories still had over him after three years. He had made a decision not to go back and he had stuck to that. But every day in the past years he had silently regretted it.

But what scared him was that if he had to make the decision again he would still have left. He couldn't explain why, not even to himself, but it just felt right despite hurting like hell.

Julian looked at the clock on the wall and noticed that his little panic attack had cost him more than half an hour so he placed the glass in the sink and went back to his room to finish getting ready.

Ten minutes later Julian grabbed his black wool coat and left his apartment hoping that the charity event would be over quickly and that maybe he'd be able to find a little distraction to take home with him.

As his driver stopped the car in front of the large, elegant building the event was taking place in, Julian felt a lot calmer than he had back at his place. He took one last calming breath before putting his show face on and opening the car. He stepped onto the red carpet that was lined with photographers and smiled as though nothing was wrong.

Somehow this calmed him down even more. It was familiar territory. When you grow up with famous parents you get used to being dragged to those events and being told to smile. This was what he knew and did best. Acting. No one was able to see how messed up he was inside. He could totally survive this evening.

After talking to some of the reporters he made his way inside and was promptly greeted by a fellow actress who pressed a glass into his hand and stood a little bit too close for Julian's comfort. She was gorgeous there was no doubt in that with her dark brown hair and brown eyes. Unfortunately not his type at all, especially the fact that she talked way too much and never even seemed to stop to breathe. Of course the first girl he would run into would want to get into his pants. Maybe if he became really desperate later on. With the excuse of having to look for his manager he left her behind looking slightly angry.

Two drinks and half an hour later he finally found his manager, a woman in her late 40's who had worked with his mother for quite some time.

"Julian, there you are. I've been looking for you. I want you to meet some people."

"Yeah, Amanda I was looking for you too but the minute I stepped inside I had some girl all over me." Julian said nonchalantly. "What was that about meeting people? You are not trying to set me up again are you?" There were times where Julian was sure that Amanda was trying to get him a proper girlfriend he could show off at the events.

"I have never tried to set you up. How can you suggest that I did such a thing," she said jokingly. "But to answer your question: No set up, just some spoiled senator's son who everyone deems important. I don't know why though…"

The thoughts in Julian's mind were racing. A Senators' son? No, it couldn't be. Why was he freaking out so much? There were other Senators' sons apart from Logan. He took another swig from the glass in his hand. He needed to calm down, so he took a deep breath and focused back on Amanda who was looking at him questioningly.

"Why do I have to meet him? I mean I am an actor, I don't care about politics." Julian asked her. Amanda just looked at him and wondered for a second why Julian was like this all of a sudden. Normally he just went along with most things she asked him to do.

"Well, I don't know. I heard something about him being a fan of yours. That's why I thought it would be nice if you talked to him for a while. You never know when stuff like this might be important."

Julian looked at her with empty eyes. This guy was a fan of his? Great! Maybe this guy had heard about some of his affairs with men and wanted a chance. The more he thought about it the better it sounded. Well, if this guy was cute and gay maybe he was the distraction he needed.

"Okay, I'll talk to him," he said slowly, pretending to be bored. "But let me go to the bathroom first and then I'll grab another drink and come find you."

"Do that. I'll be waiting somewhere over there." And with that she wandered into the direction she had just pointed out.

Julian turned around and walked towards the bathroom. He didn't really need to go but he needed a minute to himself. In the elegant bathroom he turned the cold water on and splashed some into his face. He hated that he had panicked for a split second at the prospect that this mystery guy might be Logan.

It was pathetic that after nearly three years Logan was still so very present in his thoughts all the time and he hated himself for it. He had been the one to leave, he had made a conscious decision to go, even after that wonderful and surprising kiss, so why was it still so hard?

Turning off the water he decided that he could really use a little male distraction tonight. It had been far too long since he had taken someone home with him and just enjoyed it. So, if the guy was already interested in him why not?

After stopping at the bar to get another drink Julian, who really started to feel the alcohol in his body, walked into the direction his manager had disappeared to. While walking he started to scan the crowd, not exactly looking for people he knew but maybe he could take a guess who said guy was. He hoped that the guy was taller than him that was a must for him. Maybe this guy knew how to be a little rough with him. Hadn't Amanda said something about this guy being spoiled? He hoped that this guy might have a bit of an attitude nothing too strong but maybe he wouldn't take his bullshit. Well, one can dream right?

He didn't get very far when a soft hand touched his shoulder.

"Julian, there you are. Here is someone who would like to meet you." So Amanda had found him and the senators' son and already taken the liberty of telling this guy that Julian would meet him.

Julian put on his trademark smile and slowly turned around, only to look up into pale green eyes.

* * *

**A/N: I hope you liked the first chapter. It would be lovely if you left me a review. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Here is the next Chapter. Hope you enjoy it. Reviews are as always very, very welcome.**

* * *

The second his eyes focused on the familiar green ones Julian was sure that his mind was completely empty and all noises around him subsided. He just stood there looking at the one person he had loved for such a long time. The last person he had expected to see tonight. But if Julian was honest with himself, he was also the one person he had wanted to see every single day in the past three years.

Julian felt the pounding of his heart in his chest and was sure that the people standing close by must be able to hear it. He was still staring at the person standing in front of him and nobody had said a word so far, not even Amanda and she was usually hard to shut up. How much time had passed since he turned around? Could have been an hour or maybe just a few seconds. Julian had not only lost his sense of time no as cheesy as it sounds he had lost himself in those pale green eyes, just like he had all those years ago.

He was brought back to reality by Amanda who cleared her throat and looked intently at Julian.

"Okay, Julian this is…" Amanda started but was interrupted by Julian.

"..John Logan Wright III."

Amanda looked confused from one man to the other.

"You two know each other?" Amanda asked still confused by Julian's behaviour.

For what seemed like an eternity no one said anything. Julian's eyes were still locked on Logan's. But neither Logan nor Julian made any move towards each other.

Julian broke the eye contact for a few seconds and let his gaze sweep over Logan's appearance. His hair was longer than it had been at Dalton. It gave Logan an edgier more mature look that suited him well and Julian had the sudden urge to run his fingers through Logan's hair. The taller boy wore a dark grey suit with a red button-up underneath and a grey tie. Julian felt a familiar tingle going through his body because Logan looked better than ever.

Logan was the first one to regain his ability to form words.

"Yeah, we went to school together." Logan broke the eye contact at this point and turned towards Amanda with an apologetic face. "Sorry that I didn't say anything before but I was… well, a bit unsure about Julian's reaction. We haven't seen each other in a really long time." He gave her one of his oh-so charming smiles.

Amanda still looked a little bit puzzled but seemed to relax. "Alright, I guess you two have some catching up to do. I'll leave you to it." With these words she turned around wand wandered off into the opposite direction.

Her absence left the men all to themselves. Both unsure of what to say.

This time Julian was the first to talk.

"What are you doing here?" It came out a bit harsher than he had intended but he blamed that on the mixture of alcohol and surprise.

"Wow, Julian, way to greet someone you haven't seen in three years!" Logan snapped right back at Julian.

"I-I-I didn't expect to see you. Cut me some slack. You obviously knew that I was going to be here so stop acting like a jerk." Julian hated how his voice had broken. He didn't want Logan to know what was going on inside his mind.

"Well, that's what people normally call a surprise!"Logan's voice dripped with sarcasm. "No reason to be rude though."

Julian felt his anger flare. How dare Logan just walk in here and be all nonchalant about things. Like they had parted on friendly terms, like nothing had ever happened. But it was his own fault wasn't it? He was the one that had left after their kiss. He didn't even look back. Logan had every right to be angry but somehow he wasn't.

Maybe he was still on medication? He really hated this side of Logan. He'd rather have him yell and fight than being this cold. Not that yelling in the middle of a room full of important people would be a good thing but at least it would be familiar territory for Julian. He knew how to deal with a shouting and raging Logan. But this calm, collect and ice-cold Logan was unpredictable and Julian didn't know how to handle him.

"You lost your voice or something Julian?" Logan sneered.

"Alright, Logan. You know that two can play this game." Julian hesitated for a second and opted for a calm remark. "Nice to see you. What are you doing here?"

Julian could see that Logan wasn't happy with his choice of words.

"Julian stop acting like an idiot. No need for pleasantries."Logan stopped for a second and simply looked at Julian which made the smaller boy rather uncomfortable. "I was invited. Well... my father was but he couldn't make it and I read somewhere that the famous Julian Larson will grace this event with his glorious presence. So I decided to come. Thought it would be nice to see such a good friend again after three fucking years."

Julian could see in Logan's eyes that the last sentence was a slip up in his calm and ice-cold demeanour. So maybe there were some emotions left in Logan. If his words were any indication he was thoroughly pissed about what happened. But what exactly was he angry about? The fact that Julian had left and stopped talking to him or the events before his abrupt departure?

He felt that he didn't really care or maybe he cared too much. All those years Julian had guarded himself around people even around his own feelings and memories and now everything came rushing back. He needed to get out of here.

"So you thought you'd just stop by and we'd be sharing our stories and talk about the good old times?" Julian sneered at Logan, still not breaking their eye contact.

"Julian cut the bullshit. You have no reason to be pissed. I'm not the one who left and then changed his fucking number. So stop playing the poor victim." Logan snapped. This was the first time in their conversation that Julian saw the old Logan, the way he would start fights back at Dalton.

"Oh, now I'm playing the victim? Trust me Logan I haven't done that in three years. Not since I left that bloody school. What did you expect? A happy welcome? A proper reunion? Well tough, not gonna happen."Julian knew that he was talking himself into a rage and although fighting with Logan was the last thing he truly wanted, it felt like coming home. Seeing the anger flare in Logan's eyes was familiar.

"What the fuck do you want Wright?" He used Logan's last name because he knew that it would anger, maybe even hurt, him more.

Although Logan only shifted from one foot to the other something changed. Julian could see that something in Logan's stare was different but he couldn't put a figure on it.

"Can't we talk like normal people just once? Julian, without fighting?"

Julian had to do a double take. Who was this guy standing in front of him? What happened to the angry, bad tempered Logan he knew? The guy who would come over and start picking fights to relieve tension.

"I... Uhm..." Julian stammered. What was he to say? "You really want to catch up?"

Logan took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. This little action distracted Julian enough to miss Logan's answer.

"Julian? Are you even listening?" The taller boy's voice broke Julian from his daydream of running his hands through Logan's hair.

"Sorry. What did you say?" For the first time in their conversation Julian looked down at his shoes in embarrassment.

Logan chuckled and turned around looking around the room. "Did I miss something? Some hot girl you want standing behind me?"He focused back on Julian.

Julian looked back up at Logan shocked. What the hell was he talking about? Oh, of course the way Julian had stared at Logan's hair, the blonde must have thought that his attention was somewhere else. If he only knew what the simple action of running his hands through his hair did to Julian.

Maybe they should talk about it. Wasn't Logan's reason to come to this party to see Julian a good sign?

"You know if you have a date running around here somewhere I don't want to keep you. I mean it's not like I came here by myself anyway and I guess he is already looking for me."

So Logan wasn't here alone. Of course not. Julian felt the jealousy raging inside him. But two could play that game. After all there was the actress from earlier and he definitely needed the distraction.

"Yeah I think I need to get back to HER!" He emphasized the female pronoun hoping to see a reaction in Logan but the blonde was as calm as ever. "We didn't plan on staying so long and I guess she's eager to leave." Julian knew that he started rambling. But although the urge to leave and hide away from Logan was strong, a small portion of Julian wanted to talk to Logan. Seeing the object of so many dreams standing in front of him brought back all the memories and feelings he had tried to bury for such a long time. All he wanted to do was touch Logan, hold him and finally tell him everything.

He needed to be with him. But he couldn't. It would never happen and he wasn't going to allow his heart to break any further.

He stared back down at the glass in his hand and decided that it wouldn't be a good idea to do anything about his feelings while he was slightly tipsy. It was too dangerous. Julian had always been a very talkative drunk and he had to keep his guards up around Logan.

When Julian looked back up at Logan he thought that for a second he saw something glimmer in the other boys' eyes. Jealousy. Sadness. Disappointment. He didn't have time to figure it out because it was gone too quickly.

"Julian we really need to talk. Don't think you can just leave again." Logan said and something in the way he said it confused Julian even more.

"Okay, we'll talk about it but this isn't the right place. We could go for coffee tomorrow afternoon and talk. Trust me I won't run off." Julian said honestly because he wanted to talk about things with Logan maybe they could go back to being friends. He had left him once but seeing him here tonight showed Julian how much he still cared. Of course he knew that he was still in love with Logan but being actually this close to him made everything seem so easy.

"Coffee sounds like a plan. Give me your phone number in case anything happens."

It was decided that they'd meet at a little coffee place around the block from Julian's apartment tomorrow at 2pm to talk.

Both men still stood opposite each other not moving and still holding eye contact when another man came over and looked angry at Logan. He was their age and the same height as Julian but leaner.

"I was looking for you. You just left me standing there by myself. Is it that hard to spend the evening with me?" During his little rant he had placed a soft hand on Logan's arm which didn't go unnoticed by Julian. There it was again, the same feeling he had always had whenever Logan had found some new crush. Julian raised his glass to his mouth and downed his drink in one go.

"I see nothing has changed Logan. I'm gonna go and find my date. Goodbye." Julian snapped. And before Logan could say anything Julian had already stormed off in search for the girl from earlier.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So, here is the third Chapter finally. I'll be gone for a week on Wednesday(holidays in Ireland) and maybe I'll have some time to write but I'm not sure. I'll try my best. **

**Thank you to every one who wrote a review and everyone who put the story on alert or favs. Really it means a lot to me.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Those lovely OC's belong to CP Coulter. **

**

* * *

**

Julian quickly walked to the other side of the large ballroom where the event was held. He needed to put as much space between himself and Logan who probably had his hands all over his date by now. The jealousy was raging inside him and he couldn't fight it. He needed to get away but he couldn't leave on his own. He needed a distraction something that would keep Logan out of his mind.

He searched the room until he found the person he was looking for standing at the bar. Perfect. He strode over to the bar and stood casually next to the girl from earlier. When he spoke up to order another drink she turned around and smiled seductively at him. Julian played along because this was what he needed.

A couple of minutes and a few nice words later the girl, Lisa, was hanging all over him. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Logan and his date standing a few feet away, close together but Logan's eyes were trained on him instead of his date.

Julian was so confused. Why was Logan watching him like that? What did he really want here? Was it really just to catch up? Maybe he wanted to...No, he wouldn't go down that road. He needed to forget Logan fucking Wright. He had been hung up on this guy for way too long.

Slowly Julian leaned closer to Lisa to whisper into her ear. Of course Julian could be convincing and sweet when he wanted to and he had to be now. She turned her head towards his and he pressed his lips to hers for a few seconds. When he pulled back she stepped a little bit closer to him and put her hand on his chest.

He let his gaze seemingly casual roam through the room while all he really wanted to see was whether his little show had gotten to Logan. When he locked eyes with Logan who was still staring at them, Julian had to suppress a little smile.

But the small euphoria he felt when he saw that he got a reaction out of Logan dropped when he saw Logan stepping closer to his date and bend down a little to whisper in his date's ear, very much the same way Julian had just done. His stomach fell and all he wanted to do was to go over to Logan, take his hand and lead him towards the back to have him to himself. He could almost see it in his mind how he would push the taller boy against the wall and crush his lips to Logan's. All passion and need. Hands running all over the others body, trying to push as close to him as possible.

The need for Logan was building up inside him and since fulfilling the scenario he had just imagined wasn't an option he whispered some words to Lisa. When she nodded he took her hand in his and walked towards the back entrance so they wouldn't have to pass all the paparazzi out front.

In his haste to get away Julian didn't take the time to look back. If he had he would have seen someone looking at the door with a sad expression.

The next morning Julian was blinded by the sunlight shining through his windows. His whole body was aching and he felt like he could never get up and stand up straight. Every single muscle was burning. Why was he passed out on the couch? No wonder that he was awakened by the sunlight. That's why he had thick curtains in his bedroom that kept all the light out.

Suddenly there was a strange vibrating to his right. He slowly opened one eye only to see his phone vibrating violently on the glass table. The noise was way too loud. Slowly he reached over to read the message on his phone.

"Get your ass to the coffee shop now! Logan"

Shit! He checked the time on his phone only to see that it was already 2.15pm. He stood up quickly only to sit back down. His head was pounding like hell.

He quickly typed a reply to Logan stating that he would be there in 20 minutes.

How was he supposed to get through this day with this major headache and especially with the prospect of sitting down to talk to Logan.

Groaning he walked into his bathroom and took a quick shower. He didn't bother to style his hair; he simply pushed the still wet hair back and hoped that it would be alright. After throwing on a pair of jeans and a blue button down he grabbed his phone, his sunglasses and his leather jacket and closed his apartment door behind him. In the elevator he pulled on the jacket, put the phone into his back pocket and slipped his sunglasses into place.

Julian felt restless. He had no clue how the 'sitting down and talk about stuff' with Logan would go. For all he knew it could end the same way it had always ended back in Dalton: with a shouting match. But this was a public place so maybe they would be able to tone it down.

One side of Julian hoped that Logan would address the obvious question of what happened between them the night he had left Dalton. But the side of him that only wanted to forget or continue to dream those 'what if' scenarios hoped that Logan wouldn't bring up the topic. It wouldn't help anyone.

After all it had seemed like Logan was going steady with this guy from last night, so no need to get his hopes up. It seems like this was the one thing that would never change. Logan always had someone and Julian could do nothing against it.

Without realizing it Julian had arrived at the coffee shop. Taking a deep breath that Julian hoped would calm down his nerves a little bit, he opened the door and stepped inside.

Logan was sitting at a table in one corner of the room reading a book. He looked so calm with his hair pushed back and one hand on the cup of coffee in front of him. He wore a deep red V-neck sweater that showed only the slightest hint of his collarbone. It was a breathtaking sight. In this moment Julian realized how much he had missed to see Logan, to be close to him, to talk to him, hell even fight with him as long as his attention was on Julian alone.

Seeing Logan so relaxed brought back so many memories of stolen moments. Moments when they had studied together but Julian's eyes had been on Logan instead of his textbooks. The blonde was never more beautiful than when his attention was completely on a book. The way his eyes could be glued to a book no matter what was going on around him was a sight to behold. The one thing that had always driven him crazy was the way Logan would bite down on his lower lip whenever he got really deep into the book.

Julian shook himself out of his memories and stepped towards the counter to order his usual coffee. Taking one more deep breath he picked up the coffee and walked over to Logan's table where he plopped down on a chair opposite the blonde who looked up from his book to see who was intruding his personal bubble.

"Finally the famous Julian Larson graces the unworthy peasants with his glorious presence." Logan snickered as he tucked an old picture into his book as a bookmark.

"Shut it, Logan. I fucking overslept and my head is pounding so stop messing around." Julian groaned and took a sip from his coffee.

"At least take of the bloody sunglasses." Logan said in a much softer voice.

"It's fucking bright in here."

"You are such an asshole Julian. I am trying to play nice but all you do is put on your bitch face. Not my problem if that girl from last night wasn't good enough."

Julian looked up at Logan. What the fuck? His mind was a little bit fuzzy on the details but he remembered driving home with that actress. He had been lonely and surprised and overwhelmed by the fact that Logan had been at the event. So of course he had taken Lisa home with him but despite the fact that she had practically thrown herself at him at the event, the minute they were alone she was unsure and reluctant.

He had started to make out with her the second they had entered his apartment but he soon realized that her body was too soft, she was too small, too fragile and definitely not rough enough. He had tried to tune it up a bit but she didn't follow.

He had needed something in that moment and she was the only option so he had for once let his mind go free and pictures of Logan had flooded his mind. After they had been done he had thrown her out despite her bitchy words and everything. All he wanted was to empty the bottle of liquor he had opened earlier and pass out.

Which in retrospect hadn't been such a good idea seeing as he had overslept and had to deal not only with Logan but the hangover as well.

Julian took another sip from his coffee and then took off the sunglasses, squinting his eyes at first at the bright sun.

"Oh wow, maybe you should put the shades back on, you look like shit."

"Thanks you are as lovely as ever. I had a bit too much after I left that stupid charity event that's all. Nothing that hasn't happened before."

"So Julian Larson is a party animal now? Another girl every night?"

Julian had to hold back a chuckle. If Logan only knew how wrong he was.

"Or is it not only girls by now?" Logan asked in a voice that was almost a whisper.

Oh no! So Logan wanted to bring up the topic. He couldn't deal with that now. Julian was fighting the urge to get up and leave and hide for a few months. But he had that movie to shoot and Logan would probably end up finding him again anyways. But he couldn't talk about it.

"Shut up Wright. None of your fucking business." For a moment Julian was sure to see something flash in Logan's eyes. It wasn't anger or hate if he hadn't known better he would say it was disappointment or sadness. But it was gone too quickly for Julian to put a finger on it.

"Alright. Don't talk about it. I'll start with something easy that even you should be able to answer. How have you been?"

"Don't you read the bloody magazines? I'm bigger than ever."

"Yeah I know, every freaking magazine is covered with pictures of your ugly face. What I wanted to know is: How the real Julian has been?"

"And since when do you care? You have never cared about anything else but yourself."

"Oh stop pulling this shit with me. I am trying to be nice although you don't deserve it"

Julian's eyes snapped back to Logan's. What was the blond playing at?

"Logan, just say what you have to say. I'm so not in the mood to play your stupid games."

"Okay Julian, I'll just tell you what's on my mind. Well, actually I'm gonna tell you what has been on my mind for three years. But you wouldn't know about anything because you fucking ran away."

So, they were going to have this conversation. This seemed surreal. He couldn't have this conversation especially not in a coffee shop. Nothing good was going to come out of this.

"Logan..." Julian tried but was cut off by his friend.

"No, I am talking. Means you are listening. You fucking ran away without looking back. Okay I didn't want to interrupt your oh so important movie shoot or whatever it was you were running to. I thought if that was what you needed at the time, okay with me. But then you change your fucking phone number? Oh and not only did you forget to give me the new number, no you told me you'd call me. But you were obviously too busy fucking some actress and forgot about it. You say that I don't care about anyone but myself while you just ran away from Dalton and your friends and never looked back."

Julian looked down at the coffee cup in his hand and mumbled something.

"What was that, Larson?"

"I talked to Derek!"

"Oh, yeah cause that made me feel so much better. Not only were you talking to him, you also told him not to talk to me about you. I don't understand your fucking mind Julian. What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Somewhere in the middle of his rant Logan had started to raise his voice and people were already staring at them. Julian moved uncomfortable in his chair and fiddled with his sunglasses, trying to decide whether it would be safe to put them on again of if that would only enrage Logan more.

"Logan, shut up for a second okay?"

"What is it now Larson? Some whiny excuse for everything?"

"Stop it would you? Can we take this somewhere else? People are staring."

"Oh of course whatever pleases the amazing Julian Larson! Wouldn't want people calling the paparazzi on your ass right?"

"Logan, stop it. I just think that we shouldn't do this here. If you wanna get stuff out of your system alright. I agreed to talk but knowing us and the way our talks normally end, we shouldn't do that in public." He looked back up at Logan hoping that the other boy would calm down and agree to take this somewhere else.

Logan took a deep breath and ran one hand through his hair before speaking again.

"Okay, maybe you are right. Where do you wanna go instead?"

Shit, Julian hadn't thought about this. The obvious option would be his apartment. But that would mean that he and Logan would be alone in his apartment. Fuck, why didn't he just shut up when he had the chance to?

"Julian? You gone again?"

"No, it's alright. We could go to my place it's around the corner. At least you wouldn't disturb anyone else there with your annoying voice."

"Whatever. Let's go."

Both boys stood up and walked out of the coffee shop. Julian had put his shades back on. He wasn't in the mood for meeting fans. They didn't talk on their way to Julian's apartment but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence even though there were clearly unresolved issues between them. Despite the fact that they had fought a lot at school and that Julian had simply left and cut Logan off, somehow they were still friends.

Shouting and the use of insults were their normal behaviour. Their code for whatever they both couldn't say. It was their thing and even though Logan had always tended to shout at everyone, something in their fights had always been special.

Maybe having Logan back in his life wasn't so bad after all.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay people this is it, the last chapter. I didn't really intend to finish it in one go but somehow it came out like that. Sorry that it took me so long but I wrote like three different versions of it until it came out the way I wanted it to. So I hope you like it and I just want to say thank you for sticking with me for this and all the alerts and favourites and reviews. **

* * *

When the two boys arrived at Julian's apartment it took Julian a moment to fish his keys out of his back pocket and to unlock and open the door. He strode in and shrugged out of his leather jacket only to throw it over the back of a chair.

Logan had closed the door after him and was now looking around the clean, stylish apartment.

"Doesn't really look like your style, Jules."

Julian turned back towards Logan and stared at him. This was the first time in three years that he had heard his nickname out of Logan's mouth. It had always sounded different than the way Derek would say it and this was one of the things he had been craving in the last years. Somehow hearing the name roll off of Logan's tongue so easily gave him hope. The boy had come to see him after all.

"No, because it clearly isn't. You know my mother. Everything has to look perfect. So when I told her that I'd move out she found this apartment and had it redecorated."

Logan only smiled at that.

Julian felt like an idiot standing in the middle of his own living room with Logan unsure of what would happen next. Everything seemed surreal. If anyone would have told him a week ago that he would find himself standing here with his first real love, he would have laughed at that. This wasn't like the movies he starred in. Logan who after Julian left realized his feelings and pined after Julian for years until he found him again and they'd live happily ever after. This was reality and Julian knew enough about that. It only hurt to confuse it with the movies. The silence between them felt different now. Like both knew that something was bound to happen but neither wanted to make the first step.

Julian stood fidgeting in one spot while Logan looked around the room trying to avoid Julian's gaze.

"You want something to drink? Another coffee or anything?" Julian finally asked, needing a reason to move and do something.

"I'd ask for a whiskey but it seems like you had quite the party last night." Logan smirked and pointed at the empty bottle next to the couch.

The actor shrugged and said, "Yeah that's the good thing about living on your own. Nobody cares about the state of your apartment or whether you drink the whole bottle or not. Well, except for when an old friend comes for a surprise visit."

Julian saw something in Logan's eyes when he said the word 'friend'. A mixture of hope and disappointment. He was sure that he had never seen the tall blond so unsettled. Logan had had his hard times in school but the look on his face now was unlike anything Julian had ever seen on his friend.

"I'll get myself some water you want something or not?" The brunette asked again starting to get annoyed by feeling so unsure in his own home. It was just like old times. Something about the other would agitate the other and they'd end up fighting if no one calmed down enough.

"Water is fine." Logan answered his eyes still glued to Julian's.

"Okay, just sit down, I'll be back in a minute." Julian walked into the kitchen and got two bottles of water from the fridge. He leaned his back against the fridge door after closing it and breathed in and out deeply trying to calm down. Logan was in his apartment. Logan fucking Wright was sitting in his living room waiting for him to come back out of the kitchen so they could talk things through. More exactly to talk about what had happened before Julian left Dalton for good. It was frightening.

He couldn't stall any longer and he wondered if this whole situation seemed as uncomfortable and messed up to Logan as it did to him. Well, at least Logan had had the time to prepare for this and think of what he wanted to say. Julian had simply been thrown into this. But he was an actor so he could act like this didn't faze him at all.

Taking one last deep breath Julian walked back into the living room. Logan had thrown himself into one corner of the large couch and was still looking around the room. Hadn't it been for the blond wringing his hands in his lap Julian would have thought that he looked almost relaxed.

But he was glad that even Logan was affected by everything that was still standing between them. It made Julian feel less like an idiot.

He walked casually over to the armchair opposite the couch and plopped down.

"Here you go!" he said before throwing one of the bottles over to Logan who caught it easily.

Both boys opened their respective bottle and gulped down almost half the bottle in one go. Hadn't the situation been extremely uncomfortable Julian would have found their behaviour hilarious and like out of a comedy.

He couldn't take the silence any longer.

"So what've you been up to after school?" Logan looked at Julian as if he had just offended him.

"Really Jules? That's what you wanna talk about? Stop stalling. You know exactly what I came here for or did you get rid of your memories along with my fucking phone number?" Julian could clearly see hurt in Logan's eyes but he didn't understand why. Seeing Logan like that tore at Julian's own heart. Seeing him like that was probably even harder than being rejected. All he had ever wanted was to make Logan happy.

"Lo..." he started but his voice broke. "I didn't get rid of you number... I-I-I just couldn't talk to you. It would have been too hard... Why does it matter anyway?"

He looked at Logan defiantly. Why did it feel so good and at the same time hurt like hell to see Logan? Shouldn't he have gotten over his feelings a while ago? Why couldn't they just go back to being friends? Why did Logan have to prance back into his life right now?

Logan sat up straight looking at Julian angrily.

"Why does it matter? You are such an asshole, Jules." Logan all but yelled.

There it was again. His nickname. The way Logan spat it out did something to Julian that he couldn't describe. It kind of turned him on.

"You fucking ran away. You left me standing there like an idiot. Then you don't answer any of my calls or messages until you sent that crappy text telling me you'll call. Well, still waiting for that one. Why couldn't you talk to me?" Logan's eyes bore into Julian's. The actor could see that something in the Logan he had known three years ago had changed.

"It doesn't matter. I just had to leave. Sorry for not calling but you never cared enough about anyone else but yourself for me to think that you would even notice my absence."

Logan looked at Julian dumbfounded.

"Course I'd notice Jules. You were one of my best friends and even without what happened in the foyer I would have noticed." Logan's eyes seemed to soften for a minute but hardened as he continued. "But for you to just cut me off like that... after what happened that's just low even for you, Larson!" There it was again the use of his surname.

"It doesn't seem like it matters what happened. Look at you, you can't even say out loud what happened. Bet you just ignored everything and found yourself a new boy toy as always." Julian sneered knowing full well that he was only trying to push Logan away by insulting him.

Logan suddenly stood up and took two steps forward to stand towering over Julian.

"You don't get to decide whether it mattered or not. You have no fucking clue Larson. Don't try to play the fucking victim in all this mess. You have no idea what happened after you ran away like the fucking coward you are." Logan yelled at him, fire and anger brazing in his eyes.

Julian was sure that he had never seen the blond like this. Of course Logan had had his temper in school but something was mixed into his anger now that hasn't been there before.

"What the fuck is wrong with you Larson? Why couldn't you talk to me? Was it that bad?"

Julian looked up in shock. Suddenly Logan's face was like an open book for him to read. The thing that was most prominent next to anger was hurt. Logan was hurt? But that didn't make sense at all.

"Lo... I-I what..."

"Shut up Larson I don't want to hear more of your bullshit. I want to know what happened that made you run away and cut me out of your life. I have asked myself the same fucking question every day in the past three years." Logan took a deep breath before continuing. He stepped back towards the couch and dropped onto it. "Was it me who made you stay away? Or what the fuck happened? I need something here Jules. I need to know... I... Please..." Logan hid his face in his hands and stopped talking.

Julian sat in his chair, shocked. What had just happened? Logan Wright was sitting in front of him lost for words. He looked so vulnerable with his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands.

The actor slowly stood up and moved over towards Logan to kneel down in front of the blond. Unsure of what to do he hesitantly put a hand on Logan's knee trying to get his attention. But Logan didn't move an inch.

"Lo... I just needed some space. I had decided to leave before... before I saw you in the foyer. I needed to get out of there. I'm sorry for not answering your calls and stuff but you don't know how hard that was."

At this Logan dropped his hands from his face and glared at the brunette kneeling in front of him. Some of the fire had returned to his eyes.

"How hard it was ignoring me? Oh I bet it was. Fuck you Larson. You can't just kiss me and then fucking leave without a word. You don't know anything."

Julian saw the hurt in Logan's eyes more clearly now. What was happening?

"Logan... I... you never cared about what I did. Why did you come to find me?"

Logan snorted.

"I came because you have been in my head every single day since that night..." He whispered.

Julian's mouth fell open. Had Logan really just said what he thought he ha? He couldn't form words. Logan had been thinking about him? No, that couldn't be true.

"Lo... what? You never even took a second glance at me... why did you think I left... I couldn't take it anymore."

Once again brown eyes met green ones. The hurt in Logan's eyes had vanished and the gaze was soft and tentative. The blond placed one of his hands over Julian's that was still lying on his knee.

"You were straight, Jules. You were straight. That's why I never saw you like that. How could I have known? You were always chasing girls or talking girls with Derek. Of course I never have looked at you like that before...before that night." Julian gasped at this revelation. Everything could have been so much easier.

The blonds head fell back down after those words. Julian was stunned into silence. The thoughts were racing through his mind. Had Logan just said that he hadn't looked at Julian before that night but afterwards he had? Did the kiss change his mind? Did he see Julian differently afterwards?

The actor didn't know what to say. Everything was just so confusing right now. Had he wasted three years of time he could have spend with Logan by running away and ignoring him? Logan had been thinking about him. Logan fucking Wright, the boy he had been in love with since freshman year had been thinking about him in the past three years. What did that mean? Was Logan here to tell him that he loves him as well? But he was at the charity event with this guy and they seemed very comfortable with each other. What did Logan really want? Throw everything back into Julian's face? Break him? Was this all some kind of sick joke?

Logan watched the emotions playing out on Julian's face. His expression turning from shocked to relief and a hopeful expression into something very different. Anger? What was going on in the actors mind?

"Jules...," Logan started but cut himself off. He slowly took his hand away from Julian's, eyes still locked on the beautiful face in front of him. Uncertain of what to do he decided that maybe it was for the best if he just left.

"I'm just gonna go, Jules. Uhm... I-I-I'm sorry. Maybe we can stay in contact or something." With this the blond stood up picked up his jacket he had thrown over the arm of the couch earlier and walked over to the door, hesitating he looked back at Julian.

The actor still hadn't moved from the spot in front of the couch.

"Jules..." Logan said his voice full of longing as he tried again to shake Julian out of his stupor. This time the brunette whipped around and his eyes found Logan's once more.

Logan held his breath as he stared at Julian's angry expression. The smaller boy stood up and strode over to where Logan who still had one hand on the door handle.

"You just come here and drop all this on me? What for Logan? You have your stupid little boy toy from the charity event so why did you tell me all this? To hurt me? Sorry you are too late for that. I have been fucking hurting every day since that night."

Julian looked at his friend with all the anger that had built up in the past years. Not only since the kiss but ever since he fell for Logan in freshman year.

"I have always been in the background. Trying to set you up with whoever you wanted. So I could leave as soon as possible to get you out of my head. But it never worked. I was in love with you. All I wanted that day three years ago was to leave Dalton and never look back. I wasn't supposed to run into you and you weren't supposed to look so vulnerable in that moment. I-I-I shouldn't have kissed you it made everything worse."

And it was the truth thinking about how it would feel to kiss Logan was one thing but actually kissing him, tasting him on his tongue was more than Julian had been able to cope with. Because then he had known what it felt like and had craved it every single day in the past years.

Logan was still silently looking at his friend waiting for him to get everything out.

"And now you come here to see me and tell me that you've been thinking about me just one day after I see you with whatever boy toy that was last night. Screw you Wright for messing with my mind again. Just leave me the fuck alone."

A second later Julian felt his back collide with the door. Logan had grasped his arms and had pushed him into it. The blond was once again towering over Julian and glaring at him. One hand placed firmly on the actor's hip and the other against his shoulder to hold him in place.

"Shut up Larson!"

With this Logan bend down and crashed his lips against Julian's. After a second Julian realized what was happening and brought his hands to Logan's hips to pull him in closer. Lips were moving against each other in heated passion. This wasn't soft and gentle, it was raw and needy. Because this was what both boys had needed. What each of them had been craving for three years.

Logan bit down on Julian's lower lip a bit too hard and the actor opened his mouth in protest which gave the blond the chance to slip his tongue into the actor's mouth. Logan brought the hand from Julian's shoulder up to his jaw line stroking his cheek with his thumb and tilted Julian's head ever so slightly upwards so he could deepen the kiss. It was all teeth and deep moans escaped both of them as their tongues battled for dominance.

Julian's hands dug into Logan's hips still trying to pull the taller boy closer. He let one hand run over Logan's back and twist into his hair. Crashing their lips even closer together. Everything around them vanished all that mattered was that Logan was kissing him. Kissing him with all that he had. Even if it was only for the moment Julian would take whatever he could get.

After what felt like an eternity and no time at all the two boys broke apart panting heavily. Logan smirked down at Julian.

"Still want me to leave?" he asked his voice hoarse and deeper than usual.

"Shut up, Wright!" Julian pulled Logan back into another passionate kiss.

Julian's hand moved from Logan's hip under the hem of his sweater, grazing over the blond's hot skin. He pushed the sweater further up as best as he could without breaking the kiss. Julian moved his other hand from the back of Logan's head against his chest to push him back a little.

They broke apart once more and Julian made quick work of pulling the sweater over Logan's head. The taller boy made quick work of the buttons on Julian's shirt and pushed it off the actors shoulders in one swift motion. Their lips crashed back together as hands were roaming each other's body. Sliding over hot skin and dipping over defined muscles.

Julian moved one hand over the toned back of Logan, feeling the muscles stretch under his skin. When Logan broke the kiss a low whimper escaped Julian but it turned into a full on moan as Logan's lips connected with his jaw line. Kissing it upwards. Julian's nails dug deep into Logan's back as the blond started nibbling on his earlobe soothing the sting from his teeth with a flick of his tongue. Hot breath was ghosting over Julian's throat as Logan made his way towards his throat and placed open mouthed kisses there. Enjoying the deep growls this action elicited from the actor.

Pushing the taller boy back, Julian looked at Logan's eyes. The pale green had turned into a darker shade laced with pure lust, want and desire. Logan wanted this just as much as Julian did. Without thinking anymore the smaller boy pushed again until Logan's knees hit the couch and was pushed down onto it. A second later Julian was straddling him. The actor wove both of his hands into Logan's blond hair and pushed his head back.

He nibbled on Logan's jaw line for a bit avoiding his mouth this time. Slowly he kissed his way down over Logan's bared throat. Down over his collarbone where he bit down harshly before licking over it. Logan was moaning unashamed by now his hands resting on Julian's hips grinding them against his own.

Julian continued his path over Logan's chest placing kisses along the way. He encircled one of Logan's nipples with his tongue before carefully biting down on it eliciting another deep moan from the blond. After giving the same treatment to the other one he kissed his way back up to crash his lips once more to Logan's. Without hesitation Logan opened his mouth to let the smaller boy in. Logan sucked on Julian's tongue and the actor let out a deep moan. Hot breath washing over Logan's lips.

With a growl Logan grabbed Julian's hips tighter and pushed the actor over to one side and rolled them over so that he was hovering over him their arousals rubbing against each other in the process. Both boys let out a deep moan. Logan moved his mouth along Julian's slender neck sucking at the spot just under his ear. Julian could feel the suction and knew that he'd have a dark hickey in the morning but he didn't care as long as it was Logan marking him.

One of Julian's hands was splayed half over Logan's lower back and half on the rough material of Logan's jeans.

Logan moved from Julian's neck lower to his nipples swirling around one of them with his tongue teasing it until Julian let out a deep moan and bucked up against him. Without hesitation the blond kissed a trail down the actor's toned stomach dipped for a second into his belly button and left more open mouthed kisses further down.

"Ohh... Lo...I.." Julian moaned loudly. Logan's head shot up and he looked at his friend with a smug smile. Julian was so beautiful at this moment and it hit Logan again how he had never seen it before that night. The actor's hands had woven once more into the blond, messy hair and he was trying to resist bucking into Logan.

With a wide smile and not taking his eyes off of Julian one of Logan's hands moved to the button of the brunette's jeans and popped it open. Julian nodded once and helped Logan to get the pants off. Before lying back down he captured Logan in another heated kiss trying to pull him back fully on top of him. But Logan had other ideas. He picked up where he had abandoned his trail down Julian's stomach and pressed wet, hot kisses just above the waistband of Julian's boxers.

Julian looked down at the beautiful blond boy who was now hovering just inches away from his almost painful arousal. "Lo..." he started again but just then Logan blew hot air over the thin material of his underwear. The actor moaned loudly needing more he bucked up trying to get some kind of friction but Logan's hands were planted firmly on his hips.

Ever so slowly the blond snaked his tongue under the waistband of his boxers and finally freed his straining erection. In one swift movement Logan had pulled his underwear of and was now placing wet kisses on Julian's hips and travelled down towards his thighs avoiding Julian's erection completely.

The slow and gentle touches were killing Julian. He needed more and he needed it so badly. He whimpered loudly. "Lo, please I need you."

The blonde looked back up at Julian and smirked. "What do you need, Jules? All you have to do is ask."

Julian whimpered again. "Lo, please.. " Lust was clouding his mind and he couldn't form a clear thought.

"Fucking say it Jules, I have been waiting for this almost three years! I need to hear it." Logan growled stopping every motion.

Julian whimpered again. "Lo, please I need your mouth on me... I need you so badly."

"See that wasn't so hard was it?" Logan smirked before returning to press kisses onto the inside of Julian's thighs. The brunette let out a whine again but it turned quickly into a loud moan when Logan's mouth closed over him. The wet heat was quickly driving Julian insane. Logan swirled his tongue around his head and licked over the slit. Julian thrust up involuntarily and Logan moved his hands to his hips to keep him down.

"Oh, Lo... please I'm gonna..." Suddenly the heat around him was gone and he opened his eyes to find Logan staring at him with a smirk.

"Lo..." before Julian could say anything else Logan crashed his lips back to his and ran his tongue over his bottom lip, begging for entrance. Without hesitation Julian opened his mouth for him. He tasted not only Logan but himself on Logan's tongue as well. It was intoxicating.

Julian ran his hand over Logan's back and down to the front of his pants where he made quick work of the button and the zipper. Pushing down the jeans was a bit more difficult with Logan lying flush against him.

"Lo, I need to feel you. Pants down, now!" He growled.

Logan just smirked at him. "Aren't we bossy today!" But he stood up anyway to take off his pants and underwear. Julian's eyes had widened. The way Logan stood there amazed him and for a second he was almost sure that he was dreaming. But then he felt the weight of Logan lying back on top of him and he knew that this was real.

Julian wrapped his arms around Logan's shoulder and pulled him closer to him. Pressing his lips back to Logan's in need. Logan shifted a bit to the side and their arousals brushed together between them and both boys broke apart from the kiss and moaned loudly.

"'Faster, Lo," Julian murmured and pressed open mouthed kisses to Logan's neck. The blond complied and started moving against Julian. Hands were roaming and breath was hot on their skin. Everything else was forgotten all that mattered was the here and now. The way their bodies seemed to fit perfectly against each other and how Logan knew exactly how to move to make Julian moan. Somehow Julian knew exactly were to kiss and where to suck to elicit the most incredible noises from the tall boy.

Julian wrapped his legs around Logan's waist pressing them even closer against each other. The friction became almost unbearable and both boys were panting heavily as Logan continued to thrust against Julian.

"Jules... So close" Logan moaned and laid his forehead against Julian's shoulder.

"Yes... Lo... " Julian sighed and pressed a kiss against Logan's cheek. One hand wandered back to Logan's head and grabbed a handful of hair pulling him up. As their eyes locked back on each other he could clearly see how he was affecting Logan. His eyes seemed so much darker with lust and passion but something else was clearly visible in them. Affection.

His other hand lay sprawled against Logan's lower back and he ever so slightly pressed down trying to pull them closer against each other.

Logan moaned loudly again and his thrusts became faster and harder.

"Jules... I'm gonna..." Julian looked deep into Logan's eyes, bathing in having his full attention for once in his life.

"Come with me Lo." He sighed and crashed his lips back to Logan's. With a few more thrusts both boys fell over the edge together, shouting out each other's names.

Logan stilled his movement after both boys had come down from their highs but they were both still breathing loudly. The blond shifted and lay down next to Julian which wasn't that easy on the narrow couch. But the smaller boy rolled onto his side so that Logan could easily lie on his back. Julian moved in closer laying his head on to Logan's chest and wrapped his arms around the taller boy's waist while Logan wrapped one arm tightly around Julian's shoulder. He lifted the other one to stroke Julian's face lovingly.

Julian smirked at the affectionate gesture.

"So you've been thinking about me?"

Logan was quiet for a moment before pressing a light kiss on Julian's hair.

"That kiss was pretty amazing, Jules. Had I known you were that good of a kisser earlier I wouldn't have overlooked you." He whispered into Julian's hair before closing his eyes.

Julian still couldn't believe that he was lying on his couch naked, wrapped around an equally naked Logan Wright. It seemed like one of those movies. So maybe sometimes life was like the movies.

"Lo?" he whispered.

"Hm...?" came the short answer from Logan.

"I love you!" Julian looked up at the blond. It felt good to finally say it out loud.

Logan opened his eyes to return the loving gaze. Pale green eyes met light brown ones and the earth seemed to stand still.

"I love you too, Jules. Please don't run away again!" There was so much longing and need in Logan's eyes that made Julian wonder just what had happened to Logan in the past years.

He pressed a chaste kiss to the other boy's lips pulled back and looked deep into his eyes.

"I won't" Julian smiled repeating the last words he had said to Logan before he had left Dalton but this time they meant a new start for them.

Logan's breath evened out and Julian felt tiredness coming over him as well. Whatever happened when they woke up didn't matter because he finally had Logan's full attention and he wouldn't ever let him go.

Julian stopped thinking and simply enjoyed the feel of Logan pressed against him as he drifted to sleep.


End file.
